There is a desperation in today's culture for women to be appreciated. "Anything you can do, I can do better", composes Irving Berlin in his Annie Get Your Gun musical. After centuries of oppression, we fought for the right to vote, we've fought for higher salaries, with growing frequency we have initiated divorce with the mantra "I don't need a man". With the introduction of Planned Parenthood we were given immense freedom to "have control over our own bodies", determining both our family size and timing. World War II meant women needed to leave their nests and go to work - both to provide for their families with an absentee husband, and to supply the needs of fighting soldiers. Out of necessity, this unfair and unfortunate era initiated a hardened shell around delicate womanhood. We have lost sight of God's original intent for women - to embrace how they were created and what their role is in a home; we have distorted what was once a noble sense of purpose and diminished it to a parallel of a lowly servant. Thus, today's women feel undue pressure to "do it all". They attend college, get degrees, carry on full time jobs, oftentimes while also marrying, maintaining pregnancy, running a home, grocery shopping, preparing meals, making a myriad of decisions about life, children, finances, and somehow have to squeeze in there moments to get a shower, talk to God or crack open a Bible app. Where are the men that should be protecting women from such an enormous burden? Why don't we see more men saying "I SO appreciate that you cook, clean, nurture, decorate, budget, run errands, administer first-aid, carry on holiday traditions, and mentor younger women - that it is my privilege to go out and work hard to provide financially for what you need"? Yes, there are countless women who excel at "doing it all" - including holding down a full time job, because they are determined, and it energizes them to keep at it. I admire those women for their tenacity, but I wish I could gently put my hands on their shoulders and say "You are loved. You are wonderful. If your heart is at home with your babies, there is a God-given reason for that". Nobody else can nurture like a mother can. No one else will ever love someone as much as a woman who carried you for months under her heart, anticipating your arrival, dreaming of who you would become and how she would help to shape that. As stated by Dorothy Patterson, "A homemaker does her job without the enticement of a paycheck, but she cannot be duplicated for any amount of money, for 'She is worth far more than rubies' (Proverbs 31:10). Dorothy Morrison wrote, 'Homemaking is not employment for slothful, unimaginative, incapable women. It has as much challenge and opportunity, success and failure, growth and expansion, perks and incentives, as any corporate career'.” We have lost sight of how amazing women are, and stood idly by as they go to superhuman lengths to prove their worth. As we have striven to give women significance we have lost appreciation for how precious they are, for how precious mothers are, and for the fact that being a mother is more than "enough".
When as a society we incorporate women into every possible job field, we throw away the wonderment of specific God-given roles. Men can't be mothers, they can't carry and bear children, they aren't wired to relate emotionally to a broken heart, and they can't go to younger women and sweetly say "You'll get through this, honey. I've been where you are." When we hear of men attempting to fill those roles, it quickly becomes a laughable scenario, worthy of mockery. We wonder "what is he thinking?" As feminism has taken hold, the appreciation of women has diminished - even within the church. The push for "equality" has erased the tapestry of God's unique ideals for how women help men be men. God values us all the same, but He has distinct ideals for each sex. When we fight a war of equality, we often lose the battle of harmony. This generation is so preoccupied with genders being equal (or non-existent!) that we justify lofty expectations of women, while we simultaneously expect less and less of men. We don't need to blur the lines of gender roles, but instead should celebrate them. Thank a woman today for the gift that she is. Take a moment to appreciate how God created men and women to be different, how much he needed women to further His kingdom alongside men, but remember that we can never adequately trade places.
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October 2016
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